Under the clear blue sky

Yesterday, I decided to go for a walk at Sydney Park after spending time alone at the Newtown home since the morning. I brought with myself a package of biscuit and a book, making it sound like a small picnic on my own. The walk to the park is not long for it is quite near to the house.

I strolled along other people who walked in the park. There were many, generally a person and a pet, a dog or two. There was the children organised event in one spot of the Park and so many cheerful kids and their playmates and parents were making such a wonderful and laughing noise in the big spacious park. And suddenly I thought of my own nephew and niece. I miss having them exposed to this kind of environment where they could enjoy themselves - be free and explore their own potential. And I miss them so much. When will my country government pays greater attention to ensure that there are plenty of common space, public park, pedestrian walk, for ordinary people to enjoy their tiny family time together? It could be a way to increase the so-called happiness index that Bhutan is famously refers to.

Up and down the hill at the park - arrived at the stream where there are plenty of duck (or not ducks I am not sure) but they are beautiful creature strolling along the beautiful sunny afternoon in the crystal clear water. They were having fun and also enjoyed their own freedom too. A guy walk alone in a good pace with a loft of bread. He also cornered the stream and gazed at me. I pretended not to see him and just enjoyed myself with the ducks. And then he stopped at the other side of the stream and started feeding the creatures with the slides of bread. Each slide of bread he threw making the animals flied and fought for the piece. But he is a kind man who likes to enjoy himself with nature - I thought to myleft. Then without bothing him, I continued.

Bringing back my habit in any park of garden, I lied down on the green grass under the sunny afternoon reading my book. It was nearing the end - "she was to faced with the court answering the questions not only that of the judge but also those questions of the convicts - the rapist who committed crime and raped her and assault her - stealing her money and beat her up..." after thirty minutes, i finished the book and started walking back, strolling once and twice around the stream again.

I enjoyed the feeling whenever I go for a walk at the park or at the garden. But this time at the garden, there are happy recalled momory and hard thinking to do. I was once there with you. We went once to that highest point of the park together. Only that this time I was there alone and I could only wish that I was in one of those time traveller - not into the future but back into the past - when we were cheery and happy strolling along the park. But on this beautiful sunny day, I kind of feel empty - walking alone, reading alone (obviously you are always alone when you read) and thinking alone - about my journey so far and now that the journey is nearing the end, what is the next step!!! This is the hardest part at this point in time of life - WHAT NEXT!!! There are many petty consideration - thought - thinking - discussion - but all appears like a dreamy feeling. Nothing concrete - and why is that? No one could answer that question for me. Decision is the difficult thing to do in life but unfortunately we face plenty of time when we have to make decision, good or bad, difficult or easy. Maybe it is not the decision that is difficult to make, but to ensure that that decision comes into realisation is the hard part.

And then, my phone rang ...